I’ve been really angry lately. Like ridiculously angry. I already know that I have a temper, its tough to get me to a boiling point, but today I was at one. My anger is also really draining. I stay angry for long periods of time, during this time I tend to grind my teeth and bottle everything inside. Not only is this bad for my teeth and jaw in general, but it makes me explode at inappropriate times.
For the last couple of weeks I’ve wanted to start fighting. Not like pick fights with people, I mean in a gym, or some kind of program. I don’t want to do anything fancy, I would prefer something like boxing and kickboxing, but not the shit I do at the YMCA, you don’t even get to kick bags, you’re just kicking air.
I want to kick the shit out of a bag or dummy guy. I want perfect high kicks and punches that could debilitate someone. Oddly enough I got a Living Social ad for a popular MMA style gym in the San Diego area, Undisputed. I don’t want to go to one of those places, I would feel very out of place. I would prefer somewhere I could make an appointment and be one on one or something. I’m sure something like that would be very expensive though. Or like a real kickboxing class would work.
Today I went to yoga sculpt, unfortunately Tabu wasn’t teaching, but the schedule had my #2 back up teacher, so I was like “Oh good, I’ll still get somewhat of a good workout” NO. I don’t know if she switched last minute, but someone else taught the class and I was fucking pissed. I almost raised my hand at the beginning of class to ask where the assigned teacher was.
This pisses me off about my yoga studio. They have done this before and last time I just left. Sorry, but I go to certain classes FOR THE TEACHER, not just for the class. I think its always the teacher that makes the class. Sure I made the class harder for myself, but it was such a baby class.
I get that people train differently, but this class is supposed to be challenging, instead its fucking lame and I’m pissed that I got off my couch, and dealt with finding parking to go to a weak class.
Talking with Tabu on Monday I found out he will only be teaching sculpt 3x a week, twice on Monday, then Wednesday, and late Sunday morning. I work on Sunday, which is the only reason I don’t go to that class, but I think I may have to find a way to work it into my schedule so I can go to his class 3x a week, plus his Saturday Vinyasa.
I am going to combine that with kickboxing at the Y for now, until I find some kind of boxing class. Maybe I will goal gift myself with a boxing class if I lose a certain amount of weight or something.
I think if I combine my sculpt class with kickboxing, and spinning (going to try a class soon) then my anger may dissipate. I have an idea on my mood swings. I have been off the pill for a full month, I think it may take about 3 months to level out. I was very swingy when I first started on the pill, and I was taking them for a straight year and then got off.
From a science point of view, this makes sense to me. I just hate waiting to level out.
